i am not a feminist, or am i??!!
Been reading a lotta blank noise project blogs, it din leave me unaffected.
i study in a coed college and i belong to a gang in which there are an equal number of guys and girls. We hang around in front of the 'snack bar', lounging around the scarce free time we get, swapping stories, making fun of each other. i cherish those moments. but when a group of girls walk by..usually its the hot architecture girls who attract the max attention wth their short tops, tight jeans and streaked hair. the guys start drooling, pass a few "harmless" comments.. have a laugh.. we laugh too..coz its harmless ofcourse.. who decides that??!! .. if in our presence they feel its ok to pass comments or stare at those girls. what about when its a guys only group. they dont think what they are doing is wrong. its cool. its makes them feel more manly. they are just having fun. what harm could it bring. these friends of mine are like any other group of guys standing on the roadside enjoying the "scenery". they dont become lesser friends of mine because of this and i dont feel offended by their acts, coz im not the one facing the brunt. but when im on the road and being the brunt of a "harmless" comment, i realise those guys are just like my friends. why should i be angry at these guys alone and not at my friends." guys are like that", "we cannot change them", how convenient!!!
should i start lecturing my friends to stop being "normal college guys", i dono!
i think im being unfair to my friends, most of them are pretty decent and wouldnt dare comment out loud to a girl passing by on the street. There still are lotta guys out there who are like my friends and lotta girls in my condition, im sure.
coming to the second part of my blog.. i cannot leave without talking bout the fairer sex..
i started attracting attention pretty late in life. when i did, it shocked me at first. but if i am true to myself, i have enjoyed the attention once or twice, coz it made me feel more womanly. the harmless comments part of it tht is, we are human beings after all and we all crave attention, just a appreciative whistle, makes u feel better about urself. im ashamed of myself, but the truth is most girls take so much effort to look their best and they do enjoy the attention they get.
but there is a difference between appreciation and downright dirty, ive had my share of both. some made me so mad i felt like going and bashing the guy up. how dare he!!!!
guys are famous for their sick thoughts, they could atleast have the courtesy to keep their dirty thoughts to themselves and not broadcast it aloud.
im talking bout the eve teasing part of it alone. it is a serious offense, but ive never had to face any serious eve teasing so i guess all this crap doesnt matter in the real world. Trivandrum is a safe city that way.
The point of this blog, i have no idea. these thoughts has been nagging me for quite sometime now. i din realise there was a feminist hidden inside me. well, peek a boo!!.. dont mind the ramblings my dear friends.. just burning calories, for my fingers ofcourse! ok, tht was a pj..but i just cudnt end the blog on such a serious note. keep smiling :)
i study in a coed college and i belong to a gang in which there are an equal number of guys and girls. We hang around in front of the 'snack bar', lounging around the scarce free time we get, swapping stories, making fun of each other. i cherish those moments. but when a group of girls walk by..usually its the hot architecture girls who attract the max attention wth their short tops, tight jeans and streaked hair. the guys start drooling, pass a few "harmless" comments.. have a laugh.. we laugh too..coz its harmless ofcourse.. who decides that??!! .. if in our presence they feel its ok to pass comments or stare at those girls. what about when its a guys only group. they dont think what they are doing is wrong. its cool. its makes them feel more manly. they are just having fun. what harm could it bring. these friends of mine are like any other group of guys standing on the roadside enjoying the "scenery". they dont become lesser friends of mine because of this and i dont feel offended by their acts, coz im not the one facing the brunt. but when im on the road and being the brunt of a "harmless" comment, i realise those guys are just like my friends. why should i be angry at these guys alone and not at my friends." guys are like that", "we cannot change them", how convenient!!!
should i start lecturing my friends to stop being "normal college guys", i dono!
i think im being unfair to my friends, most of them are pretty decent and wouldnt dare comment out loud to a girl passing by on the street. There still are lotta guys out there who are like my friends and lotta girls in my condition, im sure.
coming to the second part of my blog.. i cannot leave without talking bout the fairer sex..
i started attracting attention pretty late in life. when i did, it shocked me at first. but if i am true to myself, i have enjoyed the attention once or twice, coz it made me feel more womanly. the harmless comments part of it tht is, we are human beings after all and we all crave attention, just a appreciative whistle, makes u feel better about urself. im ashamed of myself, but the truth is most girls take so much effort to look their best and they do enjoy the attention they get.
but there is a difference between appreciation and downright dirty, ive had my share of both. some made me so mad i felt like going and bashing the guy up. how dare he!!!!
guys are famous for their sick thoughts, they could atleast have the courtesy to keep their dirty thoughts to themselves and not broadcast it aloud.
im talking bout the eve teasing part of it alone. it is a serious offense, but ive never had to face any serious eve teasing so i guess all this crap doesnt matter in the real world. Trivandrum is a safe city that way.
The point of this blog, i have no idea. these thoughts has been nagging me for quite sometime now. i din realise there was a feminist hidden inside me. well, peek a boo!!.. dont mind the ramblings my dear friends.. just burning calories, for my fingers ofcourse! ok, tht was a pj..but i just cudnt end the blog on such a serious note. keep smiling :)
15 Comments:
Grt write up.. I mean, every young guy would have done his round of 'comments' and the like at some point or other. Just got a clear idea of wht goes on the other side.. the best part was tht u didnt tag either extreme. Tht made all the difference. And iam better off with a clearer picture of a 'fairer' mind.
hehehe.. Me one of those snack bar lougees.. :)
Thanks for the insights..
Thanks for the understanding..
great blog girl...but far from being a feminist , i think you are one of the most well balanced girls.....i have met.
honest write up... :)
i am honestly surprised to see some of my real world friends commenting here!
lash the goose, jedi! suppose world is such a small place, after all!
honest post indeed, but i guess all you require is the nerve to face the little punks, and show them their place.
trust me, they\'re frail hearted, more often than not.
i mean the dangerous lot.
thank u guys..thx for dropping by..really value the comments>:D<
hey... nice levelheaded observations...
:_)
Feminist???No way!!!
You have got a nice and balanced view on the issue...
this reminds me of what our class teacher had told us in loyola (my school i m damn proud of) back in our class 10 yrs .she told us of an incident she was teaching shakespear or somthin and it where the days of introduction 2 sex education and so on and our initial hormonal surges had begun she told us while she was coming to school on the way (near her home ) a batch of guys (poovalans) where commenting gals she was walking by and one of the guys SPIT TO THE GROUND !!!!!! AFTER PASSING SOM NAUGHTY COMMENT
then she told us its quite natural for boys to react in their own way when a gal passes by and U SHOULD DO IT INSTEAD OF SUPRESSING ALL NAUGHTINESS INSIDE U BUT U SHOULD NOT INSULT THE OTHER PERSON WHOEVER IT IS..u c its lack of such women (or teachers that people don't get the right orientation in life
gals must understand that except in physical structure men and women are same and are capable of thinking alike its how ur trained that leads to all this differenc
I REALLY WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO U
ON SOM OTHER POINTS PLZ DO ADD ME ON MESSENGER OR MAIL ME sree9898@yahoo.co.in i want to create a group for healthy interaction among men and women of kerala which i belive is only possible over the net .. plz do respond even if u dont mail me
just so i hav a clearer picture..girls dont comment on guys in private..? i hav more than a few girlfriends who admit they do n r quite unashamed abt it..i cnt find naythng wrong wt it either..we like the attention too..as for the extremes, thats all they are..extremes..doesnt mean evryguys a pervert..horny maybe but definitly not pervs..tho i hav to say uve been pretty unbiased abt the whole thing..
wts the fun if lil bit of such commenting wont happen :-) donno why some ppl take it too serious that they feel they had just gone thru some serious mental rape or something.
hey icy..there is nothing wrong in commenting in private!!i do to!!hehe.. ya.. ya..all guys are not perverts, i agree!!.. but some deserve to be in a mental asylum ;)
hey jithu..little commenting is fine.. but its the dirty talk which hurts us..some people just dont like to be treated like a piece of meat..women are basically more emotional, so they are more affected when someone says something dirty..thts all..is it so tough to understand??
excellent thought!!!!
heyy...
I read ur post! Pretty good work for a girl. In all my life i've wanted girls to stand up and talk for their rights and not wait for someone to fight and obtain it for them.
I particularly feel bad about the suppression of women in my community. Subjected to abject poverty or the need to marry early, they are forced to stop their education and thus their ticket to a more decent and independant life. The prophet of Islam stressed the need for education and the right of the girl to decide whether it is time for her to marry and to choose who she should marry. He also tells the women of his time to take up jobs of profit so that they may become independant from their men, financially. In that which a woman earns, a man has no share but what a man earns is rightfully for his parents, woman and children. Financial independance affords a woman the decision of whether to continue with her man or not. Women dont have to bear with torture and maltreatment cos their women!!! God told us so many times about the equality of the souls of men and women in the HOLY QUR'AN.
I would also want to stress that women are in no physical way equal to men. Men are faster and stronger beyond the shadow of a doubt, but this does not give him the permission to spearhead a hatred campaign against woman... against his mother. Men may be capable of so many things, but they sure were not chosen to bear the mechanism of god's creation, which is still a marvel to modern science.
I dare not thus limit women to bearing children, but motherhood is a quality that truly no fatherhood can counter. Women can leave their wish to bear children and live with a man, or do both and become presidents, generals or whatever it is they want to become... What everyone must remember is, as with every good thing there is something to give... and that something is the mood swings that accompany women at times of menstruation and pregnancy(both aren't vulgar words and i dont think they are either). Those mood swings cant be afforded by a nation or an army or a corporate giant. Not to tell women are not born to lead... they were not created for that!
God says... the best way for the sustenance of the precious family unit is to accept the following rule....
A WOMAN's ULTIMATE AUTHORITY IS HER HUSBAND!! AND.... A MAN's ULTIMATE AUTHORITY IS HIS MOTHER!!!!
I did say a lot of things unrelevant to the blog and the article bu i want people to read this and think for a while!!!
How green is that valley on the other side? It's always easy to say its greener here. But the truth is both sides are burnt brown!
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